Wednesday, 24 October 2012

Pituitary Awareness Quiz: Day 7

Regular readers will be unsurprised to hear that I still have not heard back from the hospital about, you know, getting my surgery arranged or whether I need to go to the MRI I'm due to have in a week. I had a really special time on Friday when I tried to contact the neurosurgery clinic to find out what the heck was going on. It went something like this:

Attempt 1:

Hospital Employee 1: Hello, switchboard at The Hospital, how may I help?
Me: Hi, could you put me through to the neurosurgery clinic please?
Hospital Employee 1: (suddenly speaking s-l-o-w-l-y and clearly) Yes, of course, I'll put you through now.
(A pause. The phone rings.)
Hospital Employee 2: Hello, Dermatology department. How can I help?

Attempt 2:

Hospital Employee 1: Hello, switchboard at The Hospital, how may I help?
Me: Hi, I just called to be put through to neurosurgery but I ended up on the dermatology phone instead?
Hospital Employee 1: Oh, sorry about that. I'll just connect you now.
(A pause. The phone rings.)

(For like five minutes, then I gave up)

On attempt 3 I got through to the Neuroscience answering machine and left a message, but I'm not hugely sanguine about the results, especially as they've now had three days to phone me. Oi vey!

Anyway, today's question is a more creative question. Presenting:

Pituitary Awareness Quiz
Day 7, Question 7

Q.7: I will be awarding a SPECTACULAR bonus of no less than FIVE POINTS to anyone who can write me a short poem (two lines is sufficient) about/vaguely related to the pituitary. Bonus points for anyone who finds a rhyme for "pituitary"!


  1. hi really enjoyed this quiz . thanks for sharing

    Free Online Quizzes

  2. I'm rhymin' all the time, it's what I do with the band
    And there really ain't a problem with pituitary gland
    But if you want the prize, you want the grand prix
    Then you've got to rhyme with pituitary
    It's like the changing of the seasons and the tides of the sea
    (That's a line from that programme on the TV
    You know, the one with Del Boy, Grandad and Rodney)
    So you know them five points, well they belong to me
    'Cos like an amputee, an addressee, the bourgeoisie
    They all kinda rhyme with pituitary.

    1. What can I say? You rocked my socks right out of the room! Five points for your efforts, good sir, and a bonus two for your excellent rhyming!

  3. There was a pituitary gland
    That started to feel a bit bland.
    Compared with all
    Its friends, it was small,
    Like the size of a pea:
    Poor pituitary.

    It decided not to be bitter;
    It got out some sequins and glitter,
    And it stuck them on,
    Till it sparkled and shone,
    And it lit up the brain
    Like the sunshine in Spain.

    So now it glistened and glowed
    More than any other gland, or even a node,
    And it all worked out just as it planned.
    That happy pituitary gland!

  4. I'm bloody angry

    time down the infirmary
    time down the dispensary
    they say it's apothecary
    and even hereditary

    I'm stationary
    I'm sedentary
    I'm really awfully weary
    it's certainly not temporary

    my behaviour's not exemplary
    and I don't want no coronary
    I'm really in a quandary
    What's up with my bloody pituitary?