Thursday 12 January 2012

A Weighty Matter

Traditionally there are two things you're not supposed to ask a woman: her age and her weight. This fact has led me to conclude that the staff at my local hospital are ill-mannered oiks, because every time I visit they demand to know my date of birth and promptly stick me on some giant hospital scales (I once had a go in a hospital weighing chair. It's just like a normal chair… except that when you sit in it, it weighs you. Surprise!). I am led to understand that they do this to everyone at the pituitary clinic, presumably because so many pituitary problems can affect your weight. Cushing's disease can lead to significant weight gain; acromegaly can as well, and thyroid hormone disturbances can have disturbing consequences for the waistline.

Before beginning treatment with lanreotide last January, I had presumably been hyperthyroid (ie. had too much thyroid hormone) for at least a year, given my symptoms. Hyperthyroidism is "supposed" to lead to weight loss, by affecting the metabolism; hypothyroidism (having too little thyroid hormone) leads to weight gain. In my case, though, this didn't hold true; I'd been hyperthyroid for a long time without weight loss, and in fact it was when treatment began to reduce my thyroid hormone levels that I started to lose weight, because I found that it reduced my appetite from "extremely peckish" to "normal person". It had never occurred to me previously that my appetite was unusually high* - but as it turns out, the hyperthyroidism caused by my pituitary adenoma was giving me an appetite which more than matched my raised metabolism. When I did begin to lose weight, the lanreotide injections may also have nudged things along, because they effectively turn off your gall bladder for a few days after each injection - the gall bladder stores bile, which aids in the digestion of dietary fats, so the lanreotide leaves the body less able to digest fats for a few days each month. Effectively it's an imbalance of the humors.

But anyway, the short story is that I've lost just about a stone over the last year, pretty slowly but steadily. A stone might not sound much compared to the stories of vast weightloss that WeightWatchers et al may peddle you, but it's over 10% of my bodyweight. That's quite a bit.

The pros of losing weight:
1. Being thinner!
2. More piggyback rides may be demanded from boyfriend
3. Getting to buy a bunch of new clothes

The cons of losing weight:
1. Having to spend a load of money on a bunch of new clothes
2. It worries my mother
3. Newfound paranoia about getting really chubby

Previously, I had never really worried about putting on gallons of weight,** but unfortunately the whole experience has underlined for me the fact that, if I can suddenly lose so much weight without trying, I could just as easily gain it, should my hormones decide they want to screw me over in a whole new way. That is a scary thought. Everyone always tells you that as long as you eat right and exercise you've nothing to worry about, and the cruel common wisdom is that everyone who's fat brought it upon themselves - but the fact is that's not always true; as I mentioned earlier, the symptoms of pituitary tumours often involve weight gain. People with Cushing's disease can eat incredibly strict rations and still put on a lot of weight; over the last year, I've experienced for myself how much even relatively small changes in thyroid hormone levels affect appetite, as well as weight and metabolism. Even right at the beginning of my lanreotide treatment, when my thyroid levels had only dropped slightly, my appetite suddenly crashed back to earth, and throughout the year it has noticeably fluctuated from month to month.

I'm really lucky that my weight change has, so far (and fingers crossed) been in an ok direction, but I can't help but worry that, should I need more treatment in the future, that might change; surgery and radiotherapy both have the potential to knock out my body's ability to produce various pituitary hormones and leave me hypothyroid rather than hyperthyroid

I now have a nightmare where I have to use the extra-large doors they have installed in the hospital for obesity clinic patients. I'm hoping that will only happen if 80's style shoulder-pads come back into vogue.

God forbid.

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*Well ok, it had, but I thought I was just extremely greedy.

**Well ok, I had, but only after watching the BBC's classic (and unspeakably horrific) programme Super Size Ambulance.

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